Lifes Little Cross Roads

I have been in the interesting position of knowing my job was going, for a few months now.

I already know that I won't be made redundant but rather redistributed to other tasks.

I think I am getting more stressed about this than I first realised, but my biggest issue is that this deal I am getting makes me feel like I am being paraded along this vast panorama window showing this fantastically lush green field on the other side, only there is no way I can get there without smashing the glass.

With a settlement package I would at least have a buffer for a few months where part time jobs earning me 30 % of what I am making now would be sufficient to keep us going a little longer, while I try to build my empire.

I do not cope well with money worries. I shouldn't say this i suppose as I co-founded a website with my wife on the subject of money. The truth of it though is that I need to feel in control, and creating that website makes me feel like I am taking a little control. When Pauline was made redundant I was perfectly happy with the situation as we had enough to live on for quite some time, because she had a package.

But I got picky about things like her spending £1100 on a "new" older and cheaper car. Especially since she hadn't sold the old car. And I take no satisfaction in the fact that she never sold her old car she was supposed to replace, and now the old heap she bought is sitting in front of our garage rusting away, Sorn'ed off the road, not tax, no MOT and no Insurance - and we'd be lucky to get £50 for it. Those sorts of thigs stress me out.

And if I had no job I think I'd be even worse. I'd certainly want to have full control, and that is not something Pauline would be comfortable with, as she wants independence. if you've read her money articels you'd know part of the reason why!

You'd have to register on =The Money Tips Review.co.uk to find out.

I have logically no problem with her desire to be independent with her money, but she spends her money like I spend my time - it could have been spent wiser!

My dad would have told me to hold fire until at least I know what sort of offers are available from the redeployment office, and I can almost hear him speak to me.

What he would have told me? Think of the money! You will have some days that are horrible, and some that are worse. Once in a while it's fun too. But on the bad days just grit your teeth and get on with it. I think this piece of advice is the one piece of advice that I recite to myself over and over again. I could almost say it is the best piece of advice he's given me.

Almost, because the best piece of advice he gave me was during his speech at our wedding, before the cancer in his brain got too bad. It was worse than we realised obviously, but even in a foreign language, he never faltered and had the guests laughing singing and welcoming Pauline in unison into our family.

As a public speaker, it is him I will always strive to become like, and it is in his memory I want to achieve my potential.

With that perspective in mind, it seems so daft to spend my days doing a job that is damaging my health, simply because of the money.

His advice?

"Make sure you always get the final word in any argument with Pauline. And make sure those words are:

yes love"

:)

Cheers,
Jon ( still progressing )

=Every Day In Every Way, I'm Getting Better And Better